Balls Deep In Our Midfielders


It’s a funny old game, football. One minute your team is, by general media and public consensus, a bit shit, full of average players, extremely thin, and lacking the X-factor. Then the Summer brings new hope,… Continue reading

Hard Out There For A Pundit


Hard Out There For A Pundit “We’ve got a Big Effing German,” they sing at Arsenal. You know who else has a Big Effing German? Germany. So, Mr Pundit, you just discovered Mertesacker,… Continue reading

If Dortmund Played In The Premier League…Updated


This post was originally inspired by one of those tweets that lustily hinted that the tweeter/Gooner would gladly swap Klopp for Wenger and thereby turn Arsenal into Dortmund overnight. Yes, if only we… Continue reading

The Fires Of The Furnace


Follow @PoznanInMyPants I, like many of you, sensed early on that something different was afoot this year. This team had some metal to it beyond just playing good football. In fact, to be… Continue reading

Shhh! Ozil thinks it’s always like this.


Shhh! Ozil thinks it’s always like this. So I sent in my idea to Arsenal via the dot com. You know the one. The one about rewarding a lucky fan once a month… Continue reading

For Whom Nothing Is Written


For Whom Nothing Is Written T.E. Lawrence (Lawrence of Arabia) was a brilliant visionary, a man of science, an outsider, a foreigner in a foreign land and in his own. He was illegitimate… Continue reading

A Theo-Shaped Hole


A Cesc-Shaped Hole I wrote a blog this summer. It was approximately 5,000 words long (my typical blog is 1,000 words long.) It was in hopeful anticipation of the Return of the Dauphin,… Continue reading

Redefining Real Madrid and Tottenham’s Special Relationship


Daniel Levy thought he could finally shaft Arsenal this summer, by delaying the Bale transfer until after the NLD, knowing we had an interest in at least one of Real’s Galacticos, with his… Continue reading

Breaking Bad – Transfer Window Special


BREAKING BAD – Written by Vince Gilligan. Adapted by Poznan. Deep blue sky overhead. Fat, scuddy clouds. Below them, black and white cows graze the rolling hills. TILT DOWN to a fat, round… Continue reading

Arsene Wenger – Hostage Negotiater


At a preseason Football Awards charity event, a number of famous footballers, managers, pundits and celebrities gathered in an exclusive London hotel. It was an extravagant and glitzy evening and, by all accounts,… Continue reading